He ever said so long she (me) is happy… But, are you? I wanted to ask.
Never had I thought I could be someone source of happiness. Came home a week to spend time with family. Mom said I am one blessed girl, having so many people to love me. My dad remembers everything I said. He grants my wishes regardless big or small. Knowing my homecoming, le mom changed bedsheet and curtains, decorated my room with flowers and sprayed scents air freshener. My brother fetches me whenever I want.
Uncles know I love herbal soup, seafood and Hakka delicacies, so I had a table full of Hakka cuisine, crab feast and big bowl of soup all by myself. Aunts cooked me food, and I never starved. Grandma still fills my bowl with loads of vegetables. Grandpa asked me to come home often. I am the eldest at home, I often take charge and make decisions. However among elder cousins, I am still one little girl. Little cousins are now all grown up, they drive me around and take care of me.
Having to live overseas almost a decade, home is where family is. I really treasure the moment being together. My love language is indeed quality time. Spending 9 days with them feel like a dream. Time sure files, I am leaving for work soon. When was the last time you see your parents? Have they have more wrinkles? Do they walk slower now? Their simplest joy is when they see smile on our faces.
These days, I got to teach them new things, introduced cocktails, explored good food places etc. Despite turning 28 this year, they still nag me for being forgetful, they still cook me dishes upon request, they still drive me around (cause I rarely drive) etc. Really glad that I am very close to my family, especially parents. Once, my friend asked: who are you closer to, mom or dad? Both, I said!
I literally told my mom everything, even though we are many miles apart. She never missed any events happened in my life, and she remembers better than I do. I am my dad’s favorite, he claimed. He only listened to me when my mom can’t even. Guess I just know how to push the right button aye? It applies the same to my little brother. Hehe. 🙂
Often we thought we are alone, especially living overseas. We never wanted to worry our families, but I always remind myself I have loving family to back me up whenever I need. My dad was saying he is very happy to see us well now, but his heart aches whenever he sees us spending money on them (buy things, eat-out etc.). It is unnecessary, he said.
I reassured, saying that you (and mom) are my motivation to work hard. When we were young, you worked hard to feed us, give us the best education. I want to do the same. I work hard so that I am able to provide you better, bring you to experience, to explore. He then relieved. Though money is not everything, but it indeed provides us more options.
It’s okay to feel helpless, it’s okay to cry (we are all humans), more importantly, you should know that there is always someone love you more than you ever know. Don’t need to feel guilty or sorry, do it now before you know. Call whoever you miss, tell them how you feel. Often we are afraid how another party will react, but that’s your assumption. Communicate, not just talk.
Hope you are happy in whatever you do. Feeling a little emo right now *packing my luggage but I am looking forward to come home in July again hehe. Ciao~